Football... & God
So what do the two have to do with each other? Well, allow me to share a story, a real life story that has unfolded before my eyes. It isn't an internet e-mail thing nor is it meant to be cute. It simply happened.
Last week, Derrick De Young, a 16 year old high school junior from South Christian High School (in the Grand Rapids area) was killed in a car accident. The accident was the result of winter road conditions, and while the driver of the car walked away, Derrick had a much different fate.
Hours after Derrick's death, last Saturday morning, the football team gathered to make a decision. They were scheduled to play in the state semi-final game that afternoon. But they would be playing without one of their teammates. Should they play? Derrick's dad, a pastor, encouraged the team to play. As the game came to a close that afternoon the scoreboard read 42 - 21, South Christian. Derrick's number was 42. The team, strong on defense, hadn't scored 42 points in a game previous to the state semi-final.
This week Derrick's funeral took place, and a good friend of mine, Ken Schripsema, had the challenge and opportunity to speak. I prayed for him; he did well!
Today the state final game was on the line for the South Christian Sailors. An hour ago the game concluded. South won a hard fought game. They are the state champs. The final score 42 - 13. Read that score again. Ponder.
While I often believe God cares little about the outcome of sporting events (and perhaps I am entirely wrong), a sense of God's goodness in the midst of pain descended on those who knew Derrick's love for God, who knew this team, and know this God. In the midst of life, in the midst of death, we can be blessed!
We ARE always, always, always, always, always in His Grip!!!!!!
Friday, November 29, 2002
I've been reading Eugene Peterson's "Working the Angles" lately, and some things he said about Sabbath helped me put into words some things I think God has been trying to get through to me lately. Jumping off Peterson's idea of Sabbath as praying and playing, here's what I wrote today.
..................................................
Sabbath is about recognizing the fact that your life is completed in Christ. That, in Christ, you are complete. You are whole, and you do not NEED to keep trying to 'become.'
Somehow we have come to exalt anxiety. We are constantly trying to impress people by demonstrating that we are busy--that we are producing--and thus, that we are useful. Anxious people are important people. People who have great concerns are 'making a difference.' But I'm not so sure that all this anxiety and busyness is a mark of godliness. Jesus said not to be anxious. Jesus himself seemed to be very relaxed about things.
I believe that the peace that Jesus exhibited was the result of the fact that he lived the Sabbath. He knew what it was to live a life of wholeness. So he could play and pray his way through life. He could share in the wedding party and even contribute to the supply of wine. I don't ever remember Jesus going around telling people, "Yeah, I've been really busy--healing people, walking on water, feeding thousands."
Hey Jesus, how's your ministry? "Oh, you know, staying busy." Nope, I never read Jesus saying anything remotely like that. But I hear it so often from pastor-types.
I hate that answer most of all when it comes out of my mouth. It is, to me, a condemnation; a sign that I have got myself to involved with doing God's work for him (or at least trying to give that impression).
But what I must come to realize is that I am really not as necessary as I think I am. Sabbath-keeping reminds me of this. If I cannot stop from my work enough to be quiet and listen to God and to my wife, then I am trying to be something I was never created to be--a god.
Praying and playing teach me that I can do things that are, to all appearances, useless, and it may be the most spiritual thing I do all week. In praying, I take the time to bend my heart toward God in silence and listen. In playing, I learn to lay back in the joy and freedom that come with attending to the One Necessary Thing.
In praying, I can stop trying to impose my will on the world around me and allow God to impose His on me. In playing I learn to receive the good gifts of God; to live in the peace that comes in knowing I am God's beloved child.
I am convinced I don't play enough. And I know I certainly don't pray enough. And by 'don't pray enough', of course, I do not mean that I don't say enough words to God or speak to Him often enough. I mean that I don't listen enough. I don't sit silently before God enough to let my life come under the careful eye of the Great Physician. No, instead I busy myself with doing 'great' and 'significant' things. Instead, I fill my ears with music and my time with distractions.
And when I say I don’t' play enough, I mean I don't play enough. I'm not talking about extreme sports or entertainments. I'm talking about enjoying the life God has given me. I'm talking about dancing and singing like we all used to do when we were kids and weren't so afraid of what other people might think of us. No, I'm not talking about the respectable play that many of us do. I'm talking about the care-free (anxiety-free) play that appears foolish to most people. I'm talking about the play that you can have when you have been stripped of all pretense and worry. I don't do these things enough.
So I wonder if I really do honor the Sabbath. Most of the time, I think that I do not. It's easy to 'go to church' (twice?) and refrain from shopping of Sundays, and call it Sabbath-keeping. But I know better. I know that those have little to do with Sabbath-keeping. Besides, for me 'Going to church' means 'going to work.' It is the most stress-filled day of the week for me (and I am not alone!).
So how can I keep the Sabbath? I need the help of others. I need people to create space where I am completely unnecessary. I need people to send me to a place of silence and solitude and not ask me 'how did it go?" (which comes off as "What did you get out of it" and "Was it productive?")
How can you keep the Sabbath? I think first you have to recognize that it is something you need--that it is something that is good for you. And then not to kill it by becoming its servant. Jesus said that the Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath. So don't get upset if our Sabbath is interrupted--unless interruptions become the rule rather than the rare exception.
Another thing you can do is to ask yourself why you do the things you do Why do you work the number of hours you do? Is it to provide for your family? Good. Is it to afford a 'more comfortable' lifestyle? That may not be so good.
But above all, follow the simple instruction of Jesus to "Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness." Pursue a listening relationship with God. Close your mouth, open your ears, and open your heart to the (sometimes painful but always good) transforming work of the Spirit of God. Sabbath is ultimately about relationship. It is about living out of a right relationship with God. By that I do not mean the 'forgiven, peace treaty with God' right relationship (as important as that is). I mean recognizing that God is God and you, as much as you like to think of yourself as if you were, are not.
I remember riding in our family van with my dad. I was nine and we were headed to Dallas, Texas to visit some of my parents' friends. I slept and played and listened to music all the way down. I was never concerned with trying to plan out our route. I never tried to wrestle the wheel away from my dad. I never even entertained the ridiculous idea that the trip depended on me. I simply played and slept all the way to Dallas with complete confidence in my dad and his ability to navigate the highways and get us there. I was useless on that trip. I was completely unnecessary. But I saw it snow in Dallas on the day after Christmas, and it was beautiful.
If I am walking with God, then I can afford to be honest with myself about how unnecessary I am. And I can know that unnecessary does not equal worthless. It simply means that I live with an appropriate smallness. God is alive and present and at work all over the world around me. Amazingly He invites me to join him in what he's up to. And that is really not too hard for me to accept (it plays to my temptation to be useful). But what I find most amazing is that he invites me to stop doing and just sit and play and listen and watch what he's doing. That's Sabbath. To stop your doing long enough to listen and see what God's up to around you and within you, and then to laugh and play and live because what He's up to is so indescribably beautiful.
..................................................
Sabbath is about recognizing the fact that your life is completed in Christ. That, in Christ, you are complete. You are whole, and you do not NEED to keep trying to 'become.'
Somehow we have come to exalt anxiety. We are constantly trying to impress people by demonstrating that we are busy--that we are producing--and thus, that we are useful. Anxious people are important people. People who have great concerns are 'making a difference.' But I'm not so sure that all this anxiety and busyness is a mark of godliness. Jesus said not to be anxious. Jesus himself seemed to be very relaxed about things.
I believe that the peace that Jesus exhibited was the result of the fact that he lived the Sabbath. He knew what it was to live a life of wholeness. So he could play and pray his way through life. He could share in the wedding party and even contribute to the supply of wine. I don't ever remember Jesus going around telling people, "Yeah, I've been really busy--healing people, walking on water, feeding thousands."
Hey Jesus, how's your ministry? "Oh, you know, staying busy." Nope, I never read Jesus saying anything remotely like that. But I hear it so often from pastor-types.
I hate that answer most of all when it comes out of my mouth. It is, to me, a condemnation; a sign that I have got myself to involved with doing God's work for him (or at least trying to give that impression).
But what I must come to realize is that I am really not as necessary as I think I am. Sabbath-keeping reminds me of this. If I cannot stop from my work enough to be quiet and listen to God and to my wife, then I am trying to be something I was never created to be--a god.
Praying and playing teach me that I can do things that are, to all appearances, useless, and it may be the most spiritual thing I do all week. In praying, I take the time to bend my heart toward God in silence and listen. In playing, I learn to lay back in the joy and freedom that come with attending to the One Necessary Thing.
In praying, I can stop trying to impose my will on the world around me and allow God to impose His on me. In playing I learn to receive the good gifts of God; to live in the peace that comes in knowing I am God's beloved child.
I am convinced I don't play enough. And I know I certainly don't pray enough. And by 'don't pray enough', of course, I do not mean that I don't say enough words to God or speak to Him often enough. I mean that I don't listen enough. I don't sit silently before God enough to let my life come under the careful eye of the Great Physician. No, instead I busy myself with doing 'great' and 'significant' things. Instead, I fill my ears with music and my time with distractions.
And when I say I don’t' play enough, I mean I don't play enough. I'm not talking about extreme sports or entertainments. I'm talking about enjoying the life God has given me. I'm talking about dancing and singing like we all used to do when we were kids and weren't so afraid of what other people might think of us. No, I'm not talking about the respectable play that many of us do. I'm talking about the care-free (anxiety-free) play that appears foolish to most people. I'm talking about the play that you can have when you have been stripped of all pretense and worry. I don't do these things enough.
So I wonder if I really do honor the Sabbath. Most of the time, I think that I do not. It's easy to 'go to church' (twice?) and refrain from shopping of Sundays, and call it Sabbath-keeping. But I know better. I know that those have little to do with Sabbath-keeping. Besides, for me 'Going to church' means 'going to work.' It is the most stress-filled day of the week for me (and I am not alone!).
So how can I keep the Sabbath? I need the help of others. I need people to create space where I am completely unnecessary. I need people to send me to a place of silence and solitude and not ask me 'how did it go?" (which comes off as "What did you get out of it" and "Was it productive?")
How can you keep the Sabbath? I think first you have to recognize that it is something you need--that it is something that is good for you. And then not to kill it by becoming its servant. Jesus said that the Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath. So don't get upset if our Sabbath is interrupted--unless interruptions become the rule rather than the rare exception.
Another thing you can do is to ask yourself why you do the things you do Why do you work the number of hours you do? Is it to provide for your family? Good. Is it to afford a 'more comfortable' lifestyle? That may not be so good.
But above all, follow the simple instruction of Jesus to "Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness." Pursue a listening relationship with God. Close your mouth, open your ears, and open your heart to the (sometimes painful but always good) transforming work of the Spirit of God. Sabbath is ultimately about relationship. It is about living out of a right relationship with God. By that I do not mean the 'forgiven, peace treaty with God' right relationship (as important as that is). I mean recognizing that God is God and you, as much as you like to think of yourself as if you were, are not.
I remember riding in our family van with my dad. I was nine and we were headed to Dallas, Texas to visit some of my parents' friends. I slept and played and listened to music all the way down. I was never concerned with trying to plan out our route. I never tried to wrestle the wheel away from my dad. I never even entertained the ridiculous idea that the trip depended on me. I simply played and slept all the way to Dallas with complete confidence in my dad and his ability to navigate the highways and get us there. I was useless on that trip. I was completely unnecessary. But I saw it snow in Dallas on the day after Christmas, and it was beautiful.
If I am walking with God, then I can afford to be honest with myself about how unnecessary I am. And I can know that unnecessary does not equal worthless. It simply means that I live with an appropriate smallness. God is alive and present and at work all over the world around me. Amazingly He invites me to join him in what he's up to. And that is really not too hard for me to accept (it plays to my temptation to be useful). But what I find most amazing is that he invites me to stop doing and just sit and play and listen and watch what he's doing. That's Sabbath. To stop your doing long enough to listen and see what God's up to around you and within you, and then to laugh and play and live because what He's up to is so indescribably beautiful.
Tuesday, November 26, 2002
Oh man, I am loving the buynothingchristmas website. I am still not sure I can do it, but every non-chicken part of me wants to.
Check this out:
Check this out:
In our entertainment-saturated culture, in our consumer drenched environment, I believe we must be vigilant against every temptation to make certain people into focal points for our pleasure. I think we might have to reconsider how we sing together. I think we might have to reconsider the way we approach teaching. I think we (the church) will definitely have to reconsider how we are arranging our chairs.
I think need to redefine many of the terms we use so loosely: worship, church, community, giving, teaching, and pastoring, just to name a few. Most of these things have become a reflection of a user-oriented, individualistic, naturalistic (by which I mean a life lived without God) culture. 'Worship' has degraded into singing songs as a group. Church has been reduced to an address and a one to two hour slot in our dayplanners (if that). Giving has been reduced to an (optional?) religious tax. Teaching no longer has much to do with learning. And pastoring has come to mean successful organizational management. Lord, have mercy!
Who is really the center of all this? We are. I think we must ask ourselves if we have turned the church into our own tower of Babel. Are we pursuing a way to make a name for ourselves under the guise of reaching for heaven? I fear that many of us are.
Dismiss me as a navel-gazer. Call me naive to 'the way the real world works.' But I can't help but wonder if our ineffectiveness in being the light of the world is a result of the fact that we have lost our sense of vocation. In our rush to be relevant and to 'make a difference', I wonder if we haven’t exchanged our God-given vocation for something more resembling capitalism? Souls and geography represent market share, etc.
What is the way forward for us? I think it will be for us to risk being seen as fools. To live as a nomadic community with no place to lay our heads (read, 'a building of our own'), so we can give our money to those we know who are in need.
There are many other ways we will be seen as fools; some of which I'm not even ready to consider right now. But if we are fools for Christ (and by that I don't mean weird in the superficially weird ways that some 'fools' are weird--in most cases, we might look weird to many in the church), we will be fools for the right reasons. Recklessly embracing the outcast, giving a voice to the voiceless, and sharing the table with 'sinners.'
I think that when we do this, we might start recapturing life with God at the center. Or maybe a better way of saying it is that when God is allowed to be the Center again, those kinds of changes will result naturally as we respond to the things we see God doing and the words we hear God saying.
I think need to redefine many of the terms we use so loosely: worship, church, community, giving, teaching, and pastoring, just to name a few. Most of these things have become a reflection of a user-oriented, individualistic, naturalistic (by which I mean a life lived without God) culture. 'Worship' has degraded into singing songs as a group. Church has been reduced to an address and a one to two hour slot in our dayplanners (if that). Giving has been reduced to an (optional?) religious tax. Teaching no longer has much to do with learning. And pastoring has come to mean successful organizational management. Lord, have mercy!
Who is really the center of all this? We are. I think we must ask ourselves if we have turned the church into our own tower of Babel. Are we pursuing a way to make a name for ourselves under the guise of reaching for heaven? I fear that many of us are.
Dismiss me as a navel-gazer. Call me naive to 'the way the real world works.' But I can't help but wonder if our ineffectiveness in being the light of the world is a result of the fact that we have lost our sense of vocation. In our rush to be relevant and to 'make a difference', I wonder if we haven’t exchanged our God-given vocation for something more resembling capitalism? Souls and geography represent market share, etc.
What is the way forward for us? I think it will be for us to risk being seen as fools. To live as a nomadic community with no place to lay our heads (read, 'a building of our own'), so we can give our money to those we know who are in need.
There are many other ways we will be seen as fools; some of which I'm not even ready to consider right now. But if we are fools for Christ (and by that I don't mean weird in the superficially weird ways that some 'fools' are weird--in most cases, we might look weird to many in the church), we will be fools for the right reasons. Recklessly embracing the outcast, giving a voice to the voiceless, and sharing the table with 'sinners.'
I think that when we do this, we might start recapturing life with God at the center. Or maybe a better way of saying it is that when God is allowed to be the Center again, those kinds of changes will result naturally as we respond to the things we see God doing and the words we hear God saying.
Monday, November 25, 2002
I received something in the mail the other day. It's a brochure for pastor types, and it's promoting a "Pastoral Summit" conference that will be held in three locations this coming spring, summer, and fall. This thing includes big names. It looks like one of the things to attend in 2003. Well, maybe not. The title of this thing... "Coming together to transform one church - yours".
Well, I don't like like the modern/post-modern debate. I don't like ripping on the traditional folks either. I do like ripping on a bad, really bad, understanding of church and God. PATHETIC!!! If that is what the church is about...
If it is about my church. If it is all about me, it is no wonder that the church of Jesus Christ is in trouble in North America. Wait. No. Let me get this right. the church of Jesus Christ is alive and well. Perhaps it is "my" church that is in trouble. Those are two entirely different things.
... you want to talk about an aweful understanding of Christ's church... sigh...
Well, I don't like like the modern/post-modern debate. I don't like ripping on the traditional folks either. I do like ripping on a bad, really bad, understanding of church and God. PATHETIC!!! If that is what the church is about...
If it is about my church. If it is all about me, it is no wonder that the church of Jesus Christ is in trouble in North America. Wait. No. Let me get this right. the church of Jesus Christ is alive and well. Perhaps it is "my" church that is in trouble. Those are two entirely different things.
... you want to talk about an aweful understanding of Christ's church... sigh...
We're taking a bit of a turn in our worship gatherings starting in December. We're going to try doing some potluck worship. No, we're not worshipping potlucks (who in the WORLD would do that?!!!). We just want our worship to be a reflection of who we are, not just a reflection of what two or three of us think it should be. Here is the e-copy of the 'menu' we passed out last night. I must say that some props go to Steve Collins from Grace for writing a simple sentence that woke me up to thie idea (he wrote: "Alternative worship is what happens when people create worship for themselves, in a way that fully reflects who they are as people and the culture that they live their everyday lives in."). Also credit goes to Cityside for something on their site that helped me with our 'menu' selections. So anyway, here's the stuff....Oh, I forgot, thanks to Daryll and John at Southside Vineyard here in G.R. for the title to our december theme, "Come to the Table."
.........................................................................
Most of us are familiar with potluck dinners—those infamous church functions when everybody brings a dish to pass. Some of the food is really good, some of it is really not so good. But we all eat and share in the experience of the meal together.
Potluck worship is kind of like that. Everybody brings something to help each other learn to worship God with our whole lives.
We want our corporate worship time to be a reflection of who we are, not just the reflection of one person’s ‘vision’ for worship. So we’re inviting you to bring something to the ‘meal.’ This ‘menu’ is a list of ‘dishes’ that you might prepare and bring during the month of December.
Our theme for December is “Come to the Table.” All through the Scriptures we see God’s concern to bring the most unlikely people to come and sit around his table. Poor people, social outcasts, helpless people, enemies, moral failures, and the other voiceless people of society; they are all welcomed to come, to eat, to drink, and to delight in the Lord.
So we will follow Jesus’ lead and “Come to the Table”. We hope you will invite some unlikely people to come and share in the meal. We hope you will bring something to share in our potluck worship. And we think that as we do this we might make God smile as we honor Him together.
Opening Responses
Welcome everyone to the gathering. Share a story. Share a prayer. Share a poem. Share a song. Just share.
Call to Worship and Prayer for God’s Blessing
Offer up a prayer, written or spontaneous, to invite God to make us aware of His presence among us.
Sung or Meditative Worship
Sing a song. Lead the group in a time of reflection and meditation on a Scripture. Express your heart for God.
Stations/Installations
Create an interactive space to direct our thinking and prayers to the places where life on earth intersects with the life of God. Make it artsy or make it simple. Create!
Reading Worship
Share a poem or psalm or prayer you’ve written. Share a journal entry or a short story you’ve read. Help us hear different ways God shapes our lives to be like His.
Lectio Divina
Lead us in a time simply reading, praying, and meditating on the Scriptures. Help us place our lives under the Scriptures to be transformed.
Prayer of Confession and Words of Forgiveness
Offer up a prayer of reconciliation. Confess. Ask forgiveness.
Devotional Expression
Share a few thoughts on how God has spoken to you through life, though the Scriptures. Share something that might help someone love God some more. Share the love.
Sermon and Response
Build a bridge between life and the Scriptures. Teach about the focus passage for the night and show us how to meet God in the ordinary. Bring us alive to the Scriptures.
Children’s Space
We love having our kids with us. They remind us of how Jesus wanted us to be. So do something for the kids. Sing a song, help them draw, or just play with them and show them God’s love.
Communion Meal
Lead us in some time around the table. Help us reconnect ourselves to Jesus—to unite ourselves with Jesus in the bread and the wine. Share a few thoughts. Share a prayer. Share some bread and wine. Celebrate the new covenant.
Concerns
Facilitate a time for people to share what’s on their heart. Ask for people to share prayer concerns, give thanks, ask questions, or just talk about where they see God at work around us.
Prayers for Others
Lead in a prayer for the world. Lead in a prayer for those mentioned in people’s Concerns. Ask a few people to pray with you, open it up to the group, or just pray yourself.
Sending Song
Sing a song. Send us out as missionaries and pastors where we live. Choose a song for us to listen to. Lead us in a song or two that communicates the heart of our topic for the night.
Sending Prayer
Send us off with a good word of God’s grace. Speak a blessing on the group and on their work in the coming week. Send us out with encouragement and hope.
december
Come to the Table
december 8
the helpless at the table
2 Samuel 9
John 8:1-11
december 15
strangers at the table
Deuteronomy 10:17-19
Matthew 15:32-38
december 22
outcasts at the table
Luke 19:1-10
Luke 14:15-24
december 29
enemies at the table
Matthew 5:43-48
Mark 14:17-26
Romans 5:8
.........................................................................
Most of us are familiar with potluck dinners—those infamous church functions when everybody brings a dish to pass. Some of the food is really good, some of it is really not so good. But we all eat and share in the experience of the meal together.
Potluck worship is kind of like that. Everybody brings something to help each other learn to worship God with our whole lives.
We want our corporate worship time to be a reflection of who we are, not just the reflection of one person’s ‘vision’ for worship. So we’re inviting you to bring something to the ‘meal.’ This ‘menu’ is a list of ‘dishes’ that you might prepare and bring during the month of December.
Our theme for December is “Come to the Table.” All through the Scriptures we see God’s concern to bring the most unlikely people to come and sit around his table. Poor people, social outcasts, helpless people, enemies, moral failures, and the other voiceless people of society; they are all welcomed to come, to eat, to drink, and to delight in the Lord.
So we will follow Jesus’ lead and “Come to the Table”. We hope you will invite some unlikely people to come and share in the meal. We hope you will bring something to share in our potluck worship. And we think that as we do this we might make God smile as we honor Him together.
Opening Responses
Welcome everyone to the gathering. Share a story. Share a prayer. Share a poem. Share a song. Just share.
Call to Worship and Prayer for God’s Blessing
Offer up a prayer, written or spontaneous, to invite God to make us aware of His presence among us.
Sung or Meditative Worship
Sing a song. Lead the group in a time of reflection and meditation on a Scripture. Express your heart for God.
Stations/Installations
Create an interactive space to direct our thinking and prayers to the places where life on earth intersects with the life of God. Make it artsy or make it simple. Create!
Reading Worship
Share a poem or psalm or prayer you’ve written. Share a journal entry or a short story you’ve read. Help us hear different ways God shapes our lives to be like His.
Lectio Divina
Lead us in a time simply reading, praying, and meditating on the Scriptures. Help us place our lives under the Scriptures to be transformed.
Prayer of Confession and Words of Forgiveness
Offer up a prayer of reconciliation. Confess. Ask forgiveness.
Devotional Expression
Share a few thoughts on how God has spoken to you through life, though the Scriptures. Share something that might help someone love God some more. Share the love.
Sermon and Response
Build a bridge between life and the Scriptures. Teach about the focus passage for the night and show us how to meet God in the ordinary. Bring us alive to the Scriptures.
Children’s Space
We love having our kids with us. They remind us of how Jesus wanted us to be. So do something for the kids. Sing a song, help them draw, or just play with them and show them God’s love.
Communion Meal
Lead us in some time around the table. Help us reconnect ourselves to Jesus—to unite ourselves with Jesus in the bread and the wine. Share a few thoughts. Share a prayer. Share some bread and wine. Celebrate the new covenant.
Concerns
Facilitate a time for people to share what’s on their heart. Ask for people to share prayer concerns, give thanks, ask questions, or just talk about where they see God at work around us.
Prayers for Others
Lead in a prayer for the world. Lead in a prayer for those mentioned in people’s Concerns. Ask a few people to pray with you, open it up to the group, or just pray yourself.
Sending Song
Sing a song. Send us out as missionaries and pastors where we live. Choose a song for us to listen to. Lead us in a song or two that communicates the heart of our topic for the night.
Sending Prayer
Send us off with a good word of God’s grace. Speak a blessing on the group and on their work in the coming week. Send us out with encouragement and hope.
december
Come to the Table
december 8
the helpless at the table
2 Samuel 9
John 8:1-11
december 15
strangers at the table
Deuteronomy 10:17-19
Matthew 15:32-38
december 22
outcasts at the table
Luke 19:1-10
Luke 14:15-24
december 29
enemies at the table
Matthew 5:43-48
Mark 14:17-26
Romans 5:8
Sunday, November 24, 2002
Tuesday, November 12, 2002
Some thoughts on listening...
How well do I really listen? I know I listen to others, but I am not sure I do it very well.
Most of the time, my mind is racing on all the things I have yet to get done. If I happen to be in a conversation, my mind is usually racing with the next thing I want to say. When I do that, I just use the other person's words and ideas as a jumping point for my next idea or statement. Of course, that can be a good thing when we are working together to come up with ideas. I have been part of some really exciting 'brainstorming' that is marked by that kind of 'leapfrogging of ideas.'
However, I am concerned here with the way that I try to make my thoughts and ideas the only 'important' ones. It then becomes important that I am heard--that I am understood--and, usually, that I am agreed with.
I am learning, though, that it can be really good to just sit silently and listen. Occasionally, I will catch my impulse to speak and I will choose to remain silent instead. It has, more than once, opened up a wonderful silence into which the other person was able to enter and share their ideas.
But I still wonder if I am listening well.
I think that listening well makes us vulnerable. We are forced to recognize our own need to change. Sometimes it is our ideas that must change. Other times it is our behavior that needs to change. And still other times, it is our attitude toward that person that needs to change.
When we listen well, we hear the pain of the other person, and we identify with them in their pain. This is not an enjoyable experience. Our own pain is bad enough most of the time, how can we bear the pain of others? We can, and I believe that we must understand it as part of our vocation to do so.
One day I sat on my front porch and listened to the world around me. I listened to the loneliness of the widows I knew. I listened to the disappointment of a family down the street. I listened to the pain of a family who had lost their son when his car struck a telephone poll right down the street from my house. And (this may sound funny to you) I even listened to the pain of the squirrel that had recently been killed by a random car driving down the road.
In this very sensitive moment, I was able to identify with the pain of the world around me. It was heartbreaking, and really a little too much for me to handle. But in that moment, I realized what it meant to listen well.
To listen is to become attentive to the world around you; to its hurts, its hopes, its joys. And ultimately, it is to be attentive to God. It is to wait; to be still until 'the other' has spoken. To do this demands time. We must lay aside our pocket calendars and take off our watches. We must put off our agendas so that we can truly be present with 'the other'. Otherwise our attention is elsewhere, and that does not respect the person with whom we find ourselves.
I realize that we live in a culture that is ruled by schedules. We have clocks, watches, calendars, and secretaries (or computer calendar programs) to remind us where to go next. Whether these things make for a better life is debatable, but I think we need to reconsider our approach to life if we can never be present where we are because we are so preoccupied with where we 'have to be' next.
I hope to become a better listener. I hope to be more attentive to the pain and joy in the world around me. I hope to be the kind of person who is attentive to the voice of God. I hope to live beyond the tyranny of the schedule so I can truly be with my wife, my parents, my brothers, my sisters, my friends, and anyone else I am with. I hope I learn to listen well.
How well do I really listen? I know I listen to others, but I am not sure I do it very well.
Most of the time, my mind is racing on all the things I have yet to get done. If I happen to be in a conversation, my mind is usually racing with the next thing I want to say. When I do that, I just use the other person's words and ideas as a jumping point for my next idea or statement. Of course, that can be a good thing when we are working together to come up with ideas. I have been part of some really exciting 'brainstorming' that is marked by that kind of 'leapfrogging of ideas.'
However, I am concerned here with the way that I try to make my thoughts and ideas the only 'important' ones. It then becomes important that I am heard--that I am understood--and, usually, that I am agreed with.
I am learning, though, that it can be really good to just sit silently and listen. Occasionally, I will catch my impulse to speak and I will choose to remain silent instead. It has, more than once, opened up a wonderful silence into which the other person was able to enter and share their ideas.
But I still wonder if I am listening well.
I think that listening well makes us vulnerable. We are forced to recognize our own need to change. Sometimes it is our ideas that must change. Other times it is our behavior that needs to change. And still other times, it is our attitude toward that person that needs to change.
When we listen well, we hear the pain of the other person, and we identify with them in their pain. This is not an enjoyable experience. Our own pain is bad enough most of the time, how can we bear the pain of others? We can, and I believe that we must understand it as part of our vocation to do so.
One day I sat on my front porch and listened to the world around me. I listened to the loneliness of the widows I knew. I listened to the disappointment of a family down the street. I listened to the pain of a family who had lost their son when his car struck a telephone poll right down the street from my house. And (this may sound funny to you) I even listened to the pain of the squirrel that had recently been killed by a random car driving down the road.
In this very sensitive moment, I was able to identify with the pain of the world around me. It was heartbreaking, and really a little too much for me to handle. But in that moment, I realized what it meant to listen well.
To listen is to become attentive to the world around you; to its hurts, its hopes, its joys. And ultimately, it is to be attentive to God. It is to wait; to be still until 'the other' has spoken. To do this demands time. We must lay aside our pocket calendars and take off our watches. We must put off our agendas so that we can truly be present with 'the other'. Otherwise our attention is elsewhere, and that does not respect the person with whom we find ourselves.
I realize that we live in a culture that is ruled by schedules. We have clocks, watches, calendars, and secretaries (or computer calendar programs) to remind us where to go next. Whether these things make for a better life is debatable, but I think we need to reconsider our approach to life if we can never be present where we are because we are so preoccupied with where we 'have to be' next.
I hope to become a better listener. I hope to be more attentive to the pain and joy in the world around me. I hope to be the kind of person who is attentive to the voice of God. I hope to live beyond the tyranny of the schedule so I can truly be with my wife, my parents, my brothers, my sisters, my friends, and anyone else I am with. I hope I learn to listen well.
Thursday, November 07, 2002
Here are a few thoughts that I posted on a discussion board a theooze.com I thought it would be worth posting them here as well:
...perhaps we need to re-evaluate what "real church" looks like. Perhaps it is a para-church organization. Perhaps it is a group of friends that like to hang out and talk about God or do service projects or just enjoy life and acknowledge that God is the Lord of their lives.
Perhaps church is more about the journey together than the destination of heaven. Perhaps it is being people living within the story of God than it is about doing morning devotions. I could go on and on... I think we need to realize that church comes in many forms that are different than our previous idea of church.
Perhaps it also means that we step out and begin new forms of church. Perhaps we need to move beyond the idea of a "church within a church" and get our elderly people to commision us to follow our own visions. Undoubtedly, and no "perhaps" on this point, we need to grow and prune churches to believe that they are a sending people.
A sending people, a missionary people, don't just send others to Africa. They also send others to grow new faith communities on the other side of the country, on the other side of the state, and also on the other side of the street. We are NOT competing here. We are brothers and sisters.
Brothers and sisters grow up and move out. Mom and dad are glad. Why doesn't the church get this concept? I'm not even sure that we as church planters, youth pastors, or Ooze addicts get this idea too well either...
If we are truly a sending people, youth pastors would be encouraged to start new faith communities. Church planters would be encouraged to grow new dreams and visions, and the family would function as it should. It needs to continue to grow, and it needs to continue to grow up... as we become kingdom people.
...perhaps we need to re-evaluate what "real church" looks like. Perhaps it is a para-church organization. Perhaps it is a group of friends that like to hang out and talk about God or do service projects or just enjoy life and acknowledge that God is the Lord of their lives.
Perhaps church is more about the journey together than the destination of heaven. Perhaps it is being people living within the story of God than it is about doing morning devotions. I could go on and on... I think we need to realize that church comes in many forms that are different than our previous idea of church.
Perhaps it also means that we step out and begin new forms of church. Perhaps we need to move beyond the idea of a "church within a church" and get our elderly people to commision us to follow our own visions. Undoubtedly, and no "perhaps" on this point, we need to grow and prune churches to believe that they are a sending people.
A sending people, a missionary people, don't just send others to Africa. They also send others to grow new faith communities on the other side of the country, on the other side of the state, and also on the other side of the street. We are NOT competing here. We are brothers and sisters.
Brothers and sisters grow up and move out. Mom and dad are glad. Why doesn't the church get this concept? I'm not even sure that we as church planters, youth pastors, or Ooze addicts get this idea too well either...
If we are truly a sending people, youth pastors would be encouraged to start new faith communities. Church planters would be encouraged to grow new dreams and visions, and the family would function as it should. It needs to continue to grow, and it needs to continue to grow up... as we become kingdom people.
Tuesday, November 05, 2002
The Church around the Table
When my family gets together for Christmas, all my aunts and uncles bring food--and I mean good food!--and presents and we laugh and play and talk about what's going on in our lives. When we sit down to eat, we enjoy what each family brought. My aunt Linda usually brings scalloped potatoes, my Grandma always brings homemade bread and bankett, my uncle Chuck brings a Honey-Baked ham, and the rest bring their specialties. It is an incredible feast. I love it.
What if, one Christmas, everyone started reading "Martha Stewart Living" and began believing that it wouldn't be an incredible feast without a Maple Roast Turkey with Riesling Gravy, Elms' Root Vegetable Red Flannel Hash, Cranberry Orange Relish, and Laurel and Holly Wreaths hangin on the walls? What if no one was able to make such exotic dishes? We would all feel like Christmas was a failure. We would all feel a little hollow inside, like our Christmas together just didn't measure up.
Thankfully, my family doesn't read Martha Stewart Living--at least they don't admit it. Unfortunately, our churches have bought into the idea that Christmas isn't Christmas without Elms' Root Vegetable Red Flannel Hash. I mean to say that our churches have bought into the idea that church isn't church without a dynamic preacher, a wicked good praise band, custom-fit self-help programs, expertly taught bible studies, and whatever else. So we look beyond the people in our group and bring in some outside help.
"We want someone who can fold napkins into a bird of paradise and crochet baby booties out of lambswool." "We need to hire a dynamic preacher," etc. Somehow we have come to believe that the people with whom we are in community are not enough to make us a 'good church.' Why don't we say, look, we are who God has given us right now, so let's make what we do a reflection of who we can be rather than who some magazine or book tells us we should be?
Until recently, our community has been without an instrumentalist. Now Kyle is playing guitar for us, and I am thankful for it. But I wonder if we didn't fall prey to the idea that we were something less than church when we were singing along to a CD. Now it is about facilities. What's next? All I am wondering is this: if we guage what 'church' is by what some book or cultural assumption, will we always be looking beyond the people we are today--and will we always be reacing to be something we are not?
If we would stop lusting through the pages of Martha Stewart Living, maybe we will realize the incredible feast God has provided for us in the people who are with us today. Yes, I would love to adopt more people into the family, and as my younger cousins grow up, they are bringing their spouses to the dinner and we are getting more food--some better, some not. Maybe someone will learn to make a Maple Roast Turkey with Riesling Gravy and fold all our napkins in interesting shapes, but it will not be less of a feast without it because we take the time to appreciate the people who come to the party and share in the food they do bring.
I hope to see our churches do the same.
When my family gets together for Christmas, all my aunts and uncles bring food--and I mean good food!--and presents and we laugh and play and talk about what's going on in our lives. When we sit down to eat, we enjoy what each family brought. My aunt Linda usually brings scalloped potatoes, my Grandma always brings homemade bread and bankett, my uncle Chuck brings a Honey-Baked ham, and the rest bring their specialties. It is an incredible feast. I love it.
What if, one Christmas, everyone started reading "Martha Stewart Living" and began believing that it wouldn't be an incredible feast without a Maple Roast Turkey with Riesling Gravy, Elms' Root Vegetable Red Flannel Hash, Cranberry Orange Relish, and Laurel and Holly Wreaths hangin on the walls? What if no one was able to make such exotic dishes? We would all feel like Christmas was a failure. We would all feel a little hollow inside, like our Christmas together just didn't measure up.
Thankfully, my family doesn't read Martha Stewart Living--at least they don't admit it. Unfortunately, our churches have bought into the idea that Christmas isn't Christmas without Elms' Root Vegetable Red Flannel Hash. I mean to say that our churches have bought into the idea that church isn't church without a dynamic preacher, a wicked good praise band, custom-fit self-help programs, expertly taught bible studies, and whatever else. So we look beyond the people in our group and bring in some outside help.
"We want someone who can fold napkins into a bird of paradise and crochet baby booties out of lambswool." "We need to hire a dynamic preacher," etc. Somehow we have come to believe that the people with whom we are in community are not enough to make us a 'good church.' Why don't we say, look, we are who God has given us right now, so let's make what we do a reflection of who we can be rather than who some magazine or book tells us we should be?
Until recently, our community has been without an instrumentalist. Now Kyle is playing guitar for us, and I am thankful for it. But I wonder if we didn't fall prey to the idea that we were something less than church when we were singing along to a CD. Now it is about facilities. What's next? All I am wondering is this: if we guage what 'church' is by what some book or cultural assumption, will we always be looking beyond the people we are today--and will we always be reacing to be something we are not?
If we would stop lusting through the pages of Martha Stewart Living, maybe we will realize the incredible feast God has provided for us in the people who are with us today. Yes, I would love to adopt more people into the family, and as my younger cousins grow up, they are bringing their spouses to the dinner and we are getting more food--some better, some not. Maybe someone will learn to make a Maple Roast Turkey with Riesling Gravy and fold all our napkins in interesting shapes, but it will not be less of a feast without it because we take the time to appreciate the people who come to the party and share in the food they do bring.
I hope to see our churches do the same.
I want to challenge what I have recently been thinking of as 'Hungry Hippo' church. In this pattern of behavior, churches do all they can to 'get more people in the doors'--and keep them in. Like the game where you hit the lever to move the hippo head and grab the marbles, some churches see their purpose as collecting as many people as they can.
To use another analogy, this approach is much like a family where the parents try to keep their children at home all their lives.
Imagine a mother and father whose 40 year old son is still living at home and incapable of living on his own--incapable of starting a family of his own--incapable of life outside the protection of mom and dad. The son is physically healthy, but the parents never raised him to be able to function on his own--never allowed him to even imagine a life where he could be married and reproduce. At best we would call this dysfunctional. At worst, we might say it's criminal.
But this is how some churches (many churches?) operate. We work hard at getting people in, but we do not entertain the thought of growing people to the point where they go out and start 'families' of their own. "What's wrong with living with your mom and dad? Don't we show you all the love you need? Don't we provide you with food and shelter?"
Of course I realize that many churches are quite happy when their members 'go into ministry.' However, these people seem to be the exception rather than the rule. Why do we not set things up so people naturally grow up and start 'families' of their own?
Maybe it has to do with power. We want some significant level of control over people. Do we create structures that make people dependent on the institution? Whether it is intentional or not, I think we do.
Codependency is a recognized dysfunction in relationships between people; why is it excused in churches? Is it because we are really more concerned with our own 'grand' agendas than with helping people develop fully functional, interdependent lives? I think we need to ask ourselves that question.
Perhaps it seems the most expedient way, the most efficient way, to get something accomplished. The bigger the group, the greater the resources, the more we can do. “So grow your group because you will be able to do more good things.” But I'm not so sure the problem is with the size of a group. I think the problem is with what we define as 'good things.'
I think that for too many churches 'good things' means what our culture would identify as success and accomlishment. This is why our churches make a big deal about how much money we have given to missionaries, or how many people have been converted, or how much influence we have in the community. I'm not saying these are bad things, but they are poor indicators of spiritual transformation.
How many churches (local communities of disciples) can say that they have never grown beyond sixty in number because the developed people into fully functional disciples who 'left home' and started families of their own? How many churches have had to ‘close the doors’ because they had ‘given birth’ to so many others that they simply had nothing more to give? Not too many, I think. Most churches celebrate the fact that their family is so big and very few of their children ever leave. Again, I'm not suggesting big is bad. I am suggesting underdevelopment is bad.
Why is our goal not to grow people up and send them out, but to get people in and keep them in? Why do we seem to be more concerned with self-preservation than mission? Maybe too many of us think self-preservation is the mission.
What if our churches were to exchange our 'keep them at home' structures for 'train them to go' structures?
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